Remember when the Biden Admin was bragging about how your 4th of July hot dogs would be 16 cents less?? Sure you do.
- Hold on... wait... someone in the audience disagrees. What's that? ... madame, please speak up. Ah yes, of course ... Joe Biden is the best President EVER.
Well that amazing inflation-busting 16-cent windfall is long past. Food inflation is at the highest level in 40 years and NOW there is a shortage of turkeys. It seems that all of the turkeys have been given lucrative positions in the Administration and there won't be enough to go around.... so buy your turkey early if ya have the freezer space.
www.cleveland.com/food/2022/10/turkey-shortage-possible-buy-early-think-local.html
Here, on the mountain, the scientists and philosophers at the prestigious neoTerra R&D Institute have been brainstorming solutions for those of us who don't have giant freezers. The Solution: Miniature SPAM Turkeys... YAY!
You just need to sculpt tiny synthetic Cornish turkeys. Make one tiny turkey replica for each guest! YAY! BTW... please use Turkey Spam to make your fake turkeys... it's more authentic that way.
At neoTerra we realize that many people lack sculpting skills so we are diligently working on a way to 3D print your ThanksBegging dinner. Unfortunately, we believe that Turkey SPAM will soon become as rare as 18-year-old Macallan Scotch.... so the team is now working on 3D printing Maggot-SPAM delights. YAY!!
See?? To all the Deniers, semi-fascists and MAGA supremacists ... Biden helping us all to see the virtues of scarcity, poverty, and depravity.
How can anyone deny the Joe is the best President EVER.
RSS Feed